WARNING: This may get really deep. Or really pathetic. Whatever.
I don't know where I was, but someone was complaining about there being too many songs about love, and how you can't find any songs about anything else. That prompted me to consider this, and I found that either this person is just suffering from something that makes love song too poignant, or they just listen to the wrong artists. My personal music collection contains so many songs not about love (whether it's being in love, losing love, looking for love, looking for lovin', etc.) Idk, maybe it's just the radio that plays too many love songs.
And I have to admit, I've had times where I was just so over anything having to do w/ love. It particularly sucks when you can't relate. Yes, I admit, in my some many years of living I have never been in love. I love people, like friends and family, and I have definitely had romantic type feelings for guys, but I have never actually been in love. Honestly, there have been many times lately when I've felt that love like that, when two people are romantically head-over-heels in love, doesn't actually exist.
It's just that, having never felt love like that, and knowing so much like I do about the bad sides of people, I find it hard to believe in sometimes. Let's clarify a few things. I am not one of those people who only believe things that I see, hear, smell, etc. And I believe you can love someone, again like friends and family. I guess that despite being a hopeless romantic, lately I have just learned about too much that makes me sad, like if there's so much badness between people who are supposed to love each other, how can there be any room for joy, or enough love out there for me. Pathetic, right?
But this is where I stick up for love songs. I have watched enough romantic comedies to know they are totally ridiculous. I can hardly believe that love really happens the way it does in those movies. If I was just going from them, I would classify romantic love as another creation of fairy tales, like dragons, fairies, trolls, etc. etc. But love songs are different. I'm talking real love songs, written by people who are/were actually in love and write about what they feel. I am NOT talking about those cheap pop songs that are written by middle-aged women and sung by teenage guys to make tweens swoon. We all know those kind of songs. They're like rom-coms, but shorter and set to music.
You can tell a real love song by listening to it. These are the ones written from the heart, from real feelings. They hit you in your soul. And sometimes you can relate and it resonates in your being. It's songs like these that give me hope true love actually exists and makes me believe. And the songs don't even have to be happy. There is something so beautiful, yet so sad, about a good painful love song. Not everything we have can stay, and not all feelings are positive, but the fact that something good was there and now gone is hope that something will come again, and at least is existed at all. That's why people say it's better to have love and lost than to never have loved at all. As someone with the later, I'd like to give the former a try.
Now, I don't want anyone to get the impression that I am one of those girls who thinks I am not complete w/o a man. Anyone who thinks that is sad. But I don't think that it's wrong, or sexist, or weak, or whatever, to believe that there's something more to gain by being with someone. I don't want to be w/ someone b/c I just want a relationship, or because I need someone to make me feel good about myself, or for any of those other lame reasons that people use. This is way I want to fall in love, to live some love songs of my own, as it were:
People have layers. Most of us have parts of us that we take different places. For me, I am not the same way I am at work as I am with my friends and family. And there are parts of me, attitudes, little quirks, habits that I don't do anywhere except when I am at home, like how I like to sing when I do dishes or just any number of cute little things. These are the kind of things that only you see, unless you are lucky enough to have someone else to share these intimate spaces of your life. And there are other things: thoughts, feelings, and things you've done that are so hard to share with anyone, but can be so easy to share with that one person. It's like there is this need in people to be known completely, but that it's okay if some of those things are only know by one person, because that's what matter most.
And that's why, no matter how annoying they can get, I defend love songs. They give use hope for love; they commiserate what we lost; and sometimes they can be glimpses into those little parts of a person to show us that someone somewhere gets it. So, love 'em if you got 'em!
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